I meant to write sooner or publish a piece before my birthday, but whenever I try to, something yanks me away from doing so. It’s either I am too occupied doing things in the office, or I am too tired and couldn’t be bothered. Sleep is golden nowadays.
So, I just turned 30.
Three decades on Earth. It’s not all it’s cracked up to be.
Life has been giving me a lot of nudges lately—maybe to see if I am still breathing. Because the last time we had a stare down, I blinked and I looked away. What a coward. Life saw that my appetite for life has been fading fast and that is why I have not written anything in a while.
Last Thursday was officially the last day of our team together. It was the end of an era. I have been contemplating on what to write to immortalize our time together as a team; all the laughter, stupid jokes, and even the small bickering that happens from time to time. Every time I try to string words together, I get stuck. There’s so much to say. So much emotion swinging me around.
There it was sitting on my e-mail inbox. A confirmation that I have been accepted as a part of ACE Talent Program. It is a program for high potential talents as future leaders. Your manager will need to nominate and fight for you for a spot. Think of it like an elite membership club.
I was just six months old with the company when I first heard about it and it has been part of my goal since. I wanted it. I wanted it so bad I can taste it. 3 years later, my acceptance letter (Hello Hogwarts, I am still waiting for yours) came. I almost punched an office friend in the face when he asked me to cancel attending the launch to attend something else. BITCH I WAITED 3 YEARS FOR THIS. I AM NOT GOING ANYWHERE.
The launch day came and I saw familiar faces. There were a lot of internal screaming happening while I was finding myself a seat.
The host told us that they hid questions under the chairs and we need to look for it and answer it if we do find one.
The first question was WHAT IS ACE TALENT? The guy answered, “I don’t know, I actually have no idea what it is and why I am here.” I wanted to strangle him and break his glasses into million pieces. He was given a privilege and he does not have any idea why he is here. I wanted to escort him out the building myself.
An ACE alumnus spoke about the program being the highest form of recognition anyone could achieve in our company. Being nominated means you are already a star, the best of the best, and joining ACE will develop you to become a superstar.
Our faces glowed with hope, drive and inspiration. Our goals were the same, to be a super star in our ways. And we were all taught that when you dream, always shoot for the stars.
Except me. I want to be a supernova.
Yung may makikilala kang tao na magiging ka-close mo at mag uumpisa kayong gumawa ng mga masasayang bagay na magiging dahilan ng pag kahulog ng loob mo sakanya.
Dadating sa punto na pareho kayong high sa isa’t-isa. Araw-araw kayong nag uusap at nagkkwentuhan. Yung isang araw na magkasama kayo, pakiramdam mo katumbas ng isang buong taon. Nakaka aliw. Nakaka baliw.
Timing is everything. But the clear explanation of why is that so is rarely forthcoming. All I know is that there’s always a right time for everything.
The right time to invest in the stock market (or not)
The right time to take a break while working on that presentation
The right time to ask for a salary raise
The right time to say the punch line to crack everyone up
The right time to hit the brake to avoid accidents
The right time to stumble on gold on the internet
I spent most of my teenage years learning Aikido because my mom thinks I should know how to defend myself when the situation calls for it. In my honest opinion, my teenage angst has got to be focused somewhere else, so off to Aikido I went and became a brown belt (Green, Purple, Yellow, Blue, Brown and Black—don’t ask me why I quit)
Aikido leverages on techniques that consist of entering and turning movements that redirect the momentum of an opponent’s attack to either joint lock or throw. The key recipe is TIMING. If you are one second too late, or one footwork too late, it won’t work. It is only as effective when you sway at the right time to redirect the momentum’s attack using only minimal effort. It’s like when someone is walking too fast and you stick out your foot and so they’ll fall.
I’ve been mulling over my career choice lately (okay, I do this daily for fun) and in times where you are consumed by the same thoughts and you are stuck in the same ideas and inspiration, you will need something new. The right time for an enlightenment came to me yesterday. The timing could not have been more perfect.
There is no right or wrong way to grow, but it is up to us to which road to take and decide at the right time.
The time is now.